By Eryka T. Johnson
Have you ever felt guilty for choosing yourself over the demands of everyone else? Do this, go there, call here, bring this, and the list goes on and on. The endless demands come from everywhere – your spouse, children, the kids’ school, your church, & your family.
I’m sure this sounds familiar if you are a woman who adores the important people in your life and want to ensure they are happy.
But, have you noticed lately that there is a burning desire within you to do more for yourself? Have you ever wondered how to stop feeling guilty for choosing yourself and the things you want? In today’s article I want to deal with how to overcome feelings of guilt to do what you love.
We all were born with incredible gifts and a need to creatively use these gifts in order to hone them and serve others. Yet, when you find yourself tirelessly working for everyone else and never getting an opportunity to focus on bringing your gifts to life, things begin to feel strange. You all of a sudden are tensed, overwhelmed, irritable, and frustrated. Not to mention, your attitude begins to stink and no one wants to be around you.
I’ve suffered from the same thing. In fact, it got so bad that I began to wonder if I was truly talented and could go beyond just being a taskmaster for everyone else except my purpose.
I was busy creating for this organization, ghostwriting for this ministry, being everything for everyone else and still feeling empty. Then, the guilt sat in. If I told this person that I could no longer help them in the same capacity I have been, what will they think of me? Would they get mad or stop talking to me? Would they gossip about me and mess up my good name? Would they ever forgive me? Would they feel like I was leaving them stranded?
I know this is hitting a nerve. I can just feel it. But, woman there is a solution and an easy fix to this problem.
First, let me be clear. Although, you feel the guilt it really is stemming from FEAR. Fear is what everyone faces first when they are ready to “possess their land” (purpose).
Let’s take a look back at Deuteronomy chapter 7 verses 1 and 2:
“When the Lord your God brings you into the land you are about to enter and occupy, he will clear away many nations ahead of you: the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites. These seven nations are greater and more numerous than you. 2 When the Lord your God hands these nations over to you and you conquer them, you must completely destroy them. Make no treaties with them and show them no mercy.”
The first nation mentioned is the Hittites. The Hittites were descendants of Heth which means fear or terror. This spirit attacks first to cause you to give up and continue being a slave to everything and everyone else instead of fulfilling the assignment on your life.
Therefore, it is imperative to attack fear head on.
The best way to address fear is to take the first step towards working on your assignment and doing what you love.
- Write down 1 goal you would like to get done in the next month.
- List the first 5 tasks necessary to complete that goal.
- Schedule time in your schedule to complete task #1 through task #5.
- Reward yourself by taking a trip to Starbucks, the local ice cream shop, the nail spa, or whatever would be a treat for you.
- Write out the remaining tasks to fully accomplish that goal and don’t look back.
- Work diligently everyday on your assignment.
You must get serious about activating your gifts and using them in the proper way. There will always be someone to give your order or tell you why you need to invest all your time helping them. That’s fine. But, don’t forget that you have been given special abilities, giftings, and an assignment that needs to get done as well.
Connect with me on Facebook and let me know how this article has helped you to overcome feelings of guilt to do what you love.
Eryka T. Johnson